Sunday, May 23, 2004

WHICH COSTS LESS TO REMOVE-- A FORESKIN OR A HORN?

Oh, dear Jesus. The L-Tard and I have been discussing whether or not to get the Mini-Leo circumcised if it's a boy. (We have decided not to if it's a girl!) I decided to let him choose since he knows what it's like to have a penis. Last night we had a conversation about this.

Me: So, have you given any thought to whether or not we should circumcise the kid if it's a boy?
Leo: Do you think it costs extra?
Me: What? Well, of course it would cost extra, but I really don't think that should be the deciding--
Leo: Why not? All other things being equal, it's cheaper to leave it on, so that's what we should do.

This morning I was telling him about all the nasty shit that a baby can have when it's first born, such as engorged breasts that leak "witch's milk" because the kid was flooded with the mother's hormones.

Me: Yeah, with our luck, the kid will leak witch's milk and have lanugo--
Leo: Eww, I hope not![Something about his reaction made me think he had no idea what lanugo was.]
Me: Do you even know what lanugo is?
Leo: Yeah, it's a little horn.

I finally asked him where he thought the horn would be, and he indicated that it would grow straight out of the top of the Mini-Leo's head, perhaps functioning as a sort of battering ram during the birthing process. (Later he called the horn "vestigial.") I couldn't imagine where he got this idea, but then I realized that he must've seen his baby pictures.

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